Transformative Stories of Healing

Healing is a deeply personal journey that varies from one individual to another. It can be a long and arduous process, often filled with challenges and breakthroughs. One of the most powerful ways to understand the impact of healing practices is through the stories of those who have experienced transformation firsthand. Addie worked as an MST therapist in Livingston County with juvenile court 2015-2018. In this post, we will explore two client stories that highlight the profound changes that can occur through dedicated efforts. These stories are from her work at Highfields.

Highfields’ Program Helps Sandra Find Her Voice by Laura Jurasek

Sandra* and her late husband Dave* were foster parents for 40 years. They have three biological children and three adopted children. Their youngest adopted daughter Rachel* came into their foster care when she was only 10 days old. She was born a drug-addicted baby.

Sandra and Dave were told by the foster care agency that Rachel would only be with them a short amount of time; however, they could not find anyone to adopt her. Sandra and Dave were hesitant because of their age, but they loved Rachel and decided to adopt her.

Rachel showed signs of difficulty even as a baby. As an infant, she startled very easily and would throw her hands up over her face when she heard loud noises. Even the human touch made her frantic, which was a symptom of drug-withdrawal. Rachel had constant tantrums and screamed at unexpected things.

“She was one of the roughest kids we ever took care of,” said Sandra.

When Dave passed away, Sandra and Rachel's relationship changed. As a teenager, Rachel asserted more dominance over Sandra and became abusive toward her. Sandra hid the abuse from her family and friends.

During one argument Sandra had to call the state police. The court system referred them to Multisystemic Therapy (MST) through Highfields. MST is an evidence-based practice designed to help children ages 12-17 who are experiencing multiple problems in their life.

Sandra and Rachel were not responsive to therapy at first. “They came three times a week and it was just too much. I wanted them to leave us alone,” said Sandra. “They did help, but again, I covered for Rachel.”

Rachel’s behavior did not change. It escalated to the point that Sandra had to call the state police again. Sandra went to the court hearing and saw her Highfields’ counselor, Addie Lanterman, in the hall who worked on her last MST case. Sandra told Addie everything that was going on, so Addie went to bat for the family in the courtroom and asked if she could take their case on a second time. The court approved and Addie began working with Sandra and Rachel again.

“This time it was stressed to me that I had to tell the truth because Rachel knew that I didn’t want to tell on her and she could do what she wanted,” said Sandra. “It was defeating the whole purpose of trying to get help.”

Addie focused on finding ways to de-escalate Rachel when she starts to get angry. She also initiated a support group for Sandra among her family, friends and community members. “Addie initiating the support group was the most beneficial thing to come from the MST program,” said Sandra. “As a single parent, I need a support system.”

There are twelve people in the support group who share advice with Sandra about how to approach Rachel. Sandra feels protected in the group and when she needs support, they back her up.

Since working with Highfields, Rachel has started to accept Sandra more as her mother, and not just her friend. “With just the two of us here, we were buddies,” said Sandra. “That’s nice, but still, somebody has to be in charge. I had lost that power. She lost respect for me because I kept giving in.”

Now with the right tools from MST and a support group to lean on, Sandra is optimistic about her future with Rachel.

*Names have been changed

Laura Jurasek was the communications and marketing specialist for Highfields, Inc.

Building a Fence by Laura Jurasek

Mary* admits that she hasn’t always been the best role model for her four children. She stayed in an abusive relationship for too long, her children were exposed to drugs and alcohol abuse, and they frequently had to “pick up and leave” due to her toxic relationships.

Her oldest son, Michael*, went to live with his dad when he was 9 years old. Now a teenager, he’s been acting out, getting into trouble with his friends, and using drugs and alcohol. His dad couldn’t handle him anymore, so Michael came back to live with his mom. “Michael felt like his dad dumped him,” said Mary. “He was angry about moving to a new home and starting a new school.”

Michael’s behavior did not improve. He found a new group of friends to cause trouble with and continued to use drugs. Mary decided to take Michael to a Juvenile Drug Court to receive treatment. Through the Drug Court, they were referred to Highfields’ Multisystemic Therapy Program (MST), a scientifically proven intervention for at-risk youth. They began working with MST Therapist, Addie Lanterman.

Addie learned the strengths and weaknesses of the family. She noticed that Mary doesn’t follow through with consequences, and Mary opened up about the reason why.

“I feel so guilty about the past that I let my kids get away with too much,” she said.

Addie helped her realize that Michael needs consequences or he will keep finding ways to manipulate her. Mary reached out to her close group of friends and family to help keep an eye on Michael, and to let her know if they see him doing anything concerning.  Mary also contacted his school to make sure he is attending class when he says he is.

“Addie explained to me that we are building a ‘fence’ and that Michael tries to dig his way under the fence to get what he wants,” said Mary. “Addie is here to help me pour the concrete to fill the hole and keep him safe.”

Mary and Michael are currently working with Addie in Highfields’ MST Program. Communication has improved between them, and Mary is hopeful that the program will continue to help her family.

STAY TUNED FOR PART 2

*Names have been changed to protect confidentiality

Laura Jurasek was the communications and marketing specialist for Highfields, Inc.

Part 2 Multisystemic Therapy helps mother and son communicate by Laura Jurasek

Before Highfields' Multisystemic Therapy team came along, Mary and her son, Michael, didn’t know how to communicate without arguing. 

Last year, Mary and her family moved to a new home in a new school district. This created a lot of stress for her oldest child, 15-year-old Michael. Mary saw changes in him. He was hanging out with the wrong crowd, not focusing on school and making bad decisions. They argued constantly about power dynamics, such as who was in charge or who would have the final word. They didn’t know how to communicate with each other.

Then, Michael got into serious trouble and was arrested for domestic violence and assaulting a police officer. He violated his probation and was arrested again. After the second arrest, Michael and Mary were referred to Highfields’ Multisystemic Therapy program (MST), an evidence-based treatment that addresses the systems that impact juvenile offenders (such as their homes, peers, schools, etc.).

Highfields’ therapist, Addie Lanterman, worked with Mary to create rules for Michael to help him stay on the right track with school, work and his home life. Michael wasn’t used to following rules and didn’t know how it would go.

“I had to adjust at first,” he said. “But ever since MST came, the plans have actually worked for me. It gives me a clear picture of what I need to do.” Mary agrees, “Michael is driven once he has that goal and that plan in front of him. He follows it, instead of me nagging him and then getting into an argument.”

Like most teenagers, Michael valued his peer group, but spending time with them often led to getting into trouble. Mary had to learn how to keep him from hanging out with troublesome peers who had a negative influence on her son. She already had skills to find him when he would leave home without permission. Together with the MST therapist, Mary used that strength to help Michael make better choices. 

When he ran away, Mary was persistent in finding him by connecting with his friends and parents of friends. Mary continued to improve upon these skills during the treatment.

When Michael was not around the negative influences, he appeared to abide better by the rules and structure in the home and was not using substances. 

Through the work of Addie and the MST program, Michael and his family rebuilt trust. The rules helped him manage his free time, so he’s not tempted to get into trouble. 

“MST has really been that saving hope for me,” said Michael. “I’m not in the dark anymore, and I feel happier than I used to.”

Mary and Michael aren’t arguing as much, thanks to MST. “I think the best thing we learned from MST is to disengage,” said Mary. “Michael and I can read each other pretty well, and we know when we get to that point that we need to walk away. Nothing gets solved when we’re fighting. We do eventually come back to what’s bothering us and try to address it and solve it in a calm manner.”

Although their relationship is still a work in progress, their hard work is already paying off. “Our relationship is a lot better, and we’re getting closer every day,” said Mary. “We’re not perfect, and we never will be, but I’m not looking for perfection. I think it’s a balance.”

Laura Jurasek was the communications and marketing specialist for Highfields, Inc.